Sometimes I hate how quickly I’m able to forgive someone. The fact that I can get over something within the matter of seconds gives people the opportunity to take advantage of that. I would pretty much forgive just about anything with an apology, sometimes even without one. Don’t get me wrong - this isn’t about me being the bigger person or anything. It’s more about me rather being on good terms with somebody than bad terms. Also, I hate the idea of holding grudges because hating someone can take an insane amount of effort.

Sure, at times I wish I would’ve stayed a little madder at certain situations but yet again I am so thankful that forgiveness comes easily for me. When I forgive somebody; it’s the only time my pride and stubbornness does not play a role in my decision-making. For me, it’s a matter of morals which is something that I find extremely important.

I have a friend who said to me once, “I try so hard to be different. I hate being the same.” This really got me thinking and to be completely frank, who gives a damn if the certain things you do or like is considered to be mainstream or not? Think about it, our excessive need to be individuals in this generation is what’s causing us to be the same. So in way, we’ve already lost. But who gives a damn?

Today a few friends and I did a photo-shoot at the local skatepark.

If you would like to see the behind the scenes video: http://youtu.be/hfd9dht06Y8

I’m really trying. I’m trying to get back to the person I used to be. The person who didn’t swear, who read their bible at least once a week and the person who taught the younger generation about the works of God. Somewhere along the line, I stopped. I felt so lost and I didn’t know how to get back to the start. This went on for at least two years, until I recently talked to my Legal Studies teacher who I happen to know is a true inspirational Christian. To this day, he’s still helping me find my way back to the foundation of my relationship with God.

I know that right now it might seem like an extremely slow process, but I’m going to get there in the end. I’m going to become the person I’d used to be, if not stronger. I’ve been struggling so much, but I need to do this for myself. I need to try so much harder.